So we've gotten through another Christmas.
Things I would like to accomplish today:
*Put together my new desk
*Organize our shop area in the basement
*Clean up the house/Do some more laundry
*Take the Christmas lights down from our outside tree
*Find Andy - he's been lost for some time
*Return and exchange some gifts
Things i enjoy about Vesty:
*The fireplace
*Our wooden banister
*Our curtains
3 favorite gifts i got for Christmas:
*Mandolin for cutting fruits
*Electronic weather center
*Family photos
Hope your Christmas was fantastic. We still need to get our Christmas letters in the mail.
Truth Comes a Little at a Time
there's a country song on the radio these days which has the lyrics:'truth comes a little at a time'.
when i was young, i devoured the bible for truth. i wanted to be holy, righteous, live in accordance with all of God's word, and memorize any verse which may have meaning to me. at the time i had friends who dove into the Bible head first - expecting God to truly move mountains. and we saw some amazing transformations. God moved in our little group of people. it's interesting looking back at those people who have scattered across our nation.
but each of us have gone our own ways. some are still involved in small groups. some are having affairs. some drink too much. some cuss too much. some are parents. some are married. some remain single. some of those who are married wish to be single. it's very interesting how life changing people.
but thru it all, truth remains. i believe that each of us remember those days in our youth when we sought after the Living God. we deeply desired the Living Water. We needed each other to drink from the fountain of life. We tested each other. We sinned together. Other times we kept each other from sinning. We played and worked together. We traveled together down life's crazy road. Even when things get crazy in my life now, those are the people i look to for comfort and truth.
and truth comes from them. they are brutally honest. they have my best interest in mind. they desire to see me grow and thrive during this life on earth. we trust each other's advice.
i miss that group of people. i miss the community of sharing what God is teaching. i miss being challenged to dig into God's word. i miss having a great fear of not doing what the God desires of me. miss getting up early in the morning and writing out my prayers. miss praying with fervor for those whom i feared were not traveling in God's favor. i miss the accountability of people asking what God has been trying to get me to do. that's where God's truth sinks into my soul.
it's the advent season, and i'm missing being part of a church which recognizes advent. here's some advent devotionals.
yet i see God moving in different areas of my life. i see it in my relationship with my husband. it's been nearly exactly 2 years since i met Troy for the first time at his church. we definitely had some ups and downs, yet we've both grown to trust each other. it has been an interesting second year, to say the least. some truths have some out, and some of them hurt, yet they've made us stronger as a couple. Troy is an amazing husband who is caring, kind, generous, humorous, adventurous, and devoted.
i saw truth in the eyes of the Kenyan children, dancing and singing to their Savior. that one is a double-edged sword for me. i left my heart in tanzania, so when i see anything which resembles the dream of living there, i feel a great burden for afrikans who are the lost, the needy, the broken, the bitter and the soft. one day i hope to return to visit, but i'm waiting on God's timing for that one.
been having some wonderful conversations with a friend of mine whose in her twenties. those were some challenging years for me. being single and wishing i was somewhere other than i was. my heart wanted to be africa. i was in georgia, usa. i desired to be married, without having all that commitment of marriage. head full of dreams and no means of accomplishing them. somewhat had the feeling of hopelessness. somewhat of uselessness. somewhat of oddness. yet my friends pulled me along. they didn't allow me to relish in that pity party too long. they had me traveling all around the country. i love traveling. i got out of debt during that time, too.
and here's a run down of my thirties:
30 - moved to africa
31 - got married/became a step-mom
32 - got pregnant
33 - having a baby
so we'll see what truth comes out of the coming year.
when i was young, i devoured the bible for truth. i wanted to be holy, righteous, live in accordance with all of God's word, and memorize any verse which may have meaning to me. at the time i had friends who dove into the Bible head first - expecting God to truly move mountains. and we saw some amazing transformations. God moved in our little group of people. it's interesting looking back at those people who have scattered across our nation.
but each of us have gone our own ways. some are still involved in small groups. some are having affairs. some drink too much. some cuss too much. some are parents. some are married. some remain single. some of those who are married wish to be single. it's very interesting how life changing people.
but thru it all, truth remains. i believe that each of us remember those days in our youth when we sought after the Living God. we deeply desired the Living Water. We needed each other to drink from the fountain of life. We tested each other. We sinned together. Other times we kept each other from sinning. We played and worked together. We traveled together down life's crazy road. Even when things get crazy in my life now, those are the people i look to for comfort and truth.
and truth comes from them. they are brutally honest. they have my best interest in mind. they desire to see me grow and thrive during this life on earth. we trust each other's advice.
i miss that group of people. i miss the community of sharing what God is teaching. i miss being challenged to dig into God's word. i miss having a great fear of not doing what the God desires of me. miss getting up early in the morning and writing out my prayers. miss praying with fervor for those whom i feared were not traveling in God's favor. i miss the accountability of people asking what God has been trying to get me to do. that's where God's truth sinks into my soul.
it's the advent season, and i'm missing being part of a church which recognizes advent. here's some advent devotionals.
yet i see God moving in different areas of my life. i see it in my relationship with my husband. it's been nearly exactly 2 years since i met Troy for the first time at his church. we definitely had some ups and downs, yet we've both grown to trust each other. it has been an interesting second year, to say the least. some truths have some out, and some of them hurt, yet they've made us stronger as a couple. Troy is an amazing husband who is caring, kind, generous, humorous, adventurous, and devoted.
i saw truth in the eyes of the Kenyan children, dancing and singing to their Savior. that one is a double-edged sword for me. i left my heart in tanzania, so when i see anything which resembles the dream of living there, i feel a great burden for afrikans who are the lost, the needy, the broken, the bitter and the soft. one day i hope to return to visit, but i'm waiting on God's timing for that one.
been having some wonderful conversations with a friend of mine whose in her twenties. those were some challenging years for me. being single and wishing i was somewhere other than i was. my heart wanted to be africa. i was in georgia, usa. i desired to be married, without having all that commitment of marriage. head full of dreams and no means of accomplishing them. somewhat had the feeling of hopelessness. somewhat of uselessness. somewhat of oddness. yet my friends pulled me along. they didn't allow me to relish in that pity party too long. they had me traveling all around the country. i love traveling. i got out of debt during that time, too.
and here's a run down of my thirties:
30 - moved to africa
31 - got married/became a step-mom
32 - got pregnant
33 - having a baby
so we'll see what truth comes out of the coming year.
Time Well Spent
I've had a great weekend. Gotta love the weekends where Troy is home all weekend. we had nothing planned except an one party with some friends, some singing African kids, small group, and a bunch of football. Friday night troy built a lovely fire. i really enjoy our fireplace. Woke up early on saturday morning and fixed some omelets. after finishing the omelets, it started snowing so we went back to bed. woke up about noon. drove down to kennesaw and registered with some store for our baby registry. it's crazy how much things costs for babies. (all i can say is, 'craigslist!!!'). watched the florida gators get smoked by alabama. sad. Troy fixed some awesome chicken fajitas. went to visit the Hotze's and watch some of the nebraska/texas game. sad... again. had church sunday morning with great entertainment from the Daraja Children's Choir from Kenya, Africa. i might've cried through the entire service. my heart was left there when i moved back to america. one day i would love to take our entire family to meet Flora and some other of my African friends. Mr. Brown created his fantastic chili for lunch. sat around most of the afternoon in front of the fireplace. started catching a cold. shopped for a 8" x 8" scrapbook for our Romania pictures. gonna try to get some of them finished by Christmas. that's the goal. enjoyed small group.
1/2 way thru the pregnancy now. crazy to think that 20 weeks has already flown by. looking forward to seeing if the little tike is gonna have green or blue eyes.
loving having Troy involved in this baby process. he might be WAY more excited than me. yet i know that his excitement helps me to see past how much this little person is costing us, what a challenge we have in front of us, etc. it's nearly killing Troy to not know what gender the kid is, but i love a good surprise! can't wait to hear the doctor say, 'it's boy' or 'it's a girl'. what a glorious moment that will be.
1/2 way thru the pregnancy now. crazy to think that 20 weeks has already flown by. looking forward to seeing if the little tike is gonna have green or blue eyes.
loving having Troy involved in this baby process. he might be WAY more excited than me. yet i know that his excitement helps me to see past how much this little person is costing us, what a challenge we have in front of us, etc. it's nearly killing Troy to not know what gender the kid is, but i love a good surprise! can't wait to hear the doctor say, 'it's boy' or 'it's a girl'. what a glorious moment that will be.
Thanksgiving Plans
my parents and uncle ron are coming in a few days. we are really looking forward to their georgian adventure. i'm making a list of projects which may or may not be accomplished when they come down, but it should be a good time. we're looking forward to sharing thanksgiving with them, our kids and some extended family. we're going to have a house full. can't wait!
i'm getting my life back together again. started using my planner again today. so far i've checking off several tasks, yet there are many more on the list. my life would feel much more accomplished if i would be more consistent about using my daily planner.
my heart is breaking for a certain young man. he's dealing with some serious family troubles, and he could use as many prayers as he could get.
this morning i was reading in the bible in Luke, chapter 2. there were 2 people who jumped out at me. one is an older guy named simeon, and the other is an old widow lady called anna. both of these two met the little Christ child before the died. they knew He was the Christ child. it had been revealed to them that this little child was very special and he would accomplish a great task. it amazes me that God is in divine wisdom would reveal such a marvelous revelation to this faithful people. there's a very Amos (3.7) which says, 'Surely the Sovereign Lord does nothing without revealing his plan to his servants the prophets.' makes me wonder if i have my listening ears on, or if i'm too preoccupied with my own agenda to hear what God's revelation is. i can only imagine that He desires to share what's on his heart with me since he calls me his friend (john 15.15). i want to talk to my friends, so why would that be any different for a God who created people to share in a glorious relationship.
it's a beautiful season to figure out what the sweet little Jesus child desires to share with you. so starting today, i'm gonna try to take a few minutes every day to quiet my busy mind and find a hiding place where this Christ child can reveal what going on in His life. i want to be part of something bigger than my own agenda, which isn't that exciting, adventurous, or splendid.
i'm getting my life back together again. started using my planner again today. so far i've checking off several tasks, yet there are many more on the list. my life would feel much more accomplished if i would be more consistent about using my daily planner.
my heart is breaking for a certain young man. he's dealing with some serious family troubles, and he could use as many prayers as he could get.
this morning i was reading in the bible in Luke, chapter 2. there were 2 people who jumped out at me. one is an older guy named simeon, and the other is an old widow lady called anna. both of these two met the little Christ child before the died. they knew He was the Christ child. it had been revealed to them that this little child was very special and he would accomplish a great task. it amazes me that God is in divine wisdom would reveal such a marvelous revelation to this faithful people. there's a very Amos (3.7) which says, 'Surely the Sovereign Lord does nothing without revealing his plan to his servants the prophets.' makes me wonder if i have my listening ears on, or if i'm too preoccupied with my own agenda to hear what God's revelation is. i can only imagine that He desires to share what's on his heart with me since he calls me his friend (john 15.15). i want to talk to my friends, so why would that be any different for a God who created people to share in a glorious relationship.
it's a beautiful season to figure out what the sweet little Jesus child desires to share with you. so starting today, i'm gonna try to take a few minutes every day to quiet my busy mind and find a hiding place where this Christ child can reveal what going on in His life. i want to be part of something bigger than my own agenda, which isn't that exciting, adventurous, or splendid.
It's Sunny and I'm Hopeful
It's been raining here alot lately. today is sunny and i'm loving it, even if it is a bit chilly outside. the leaves are starting to change color and the drive in the mountains this weekend is going to be amazing!
my friend, lauracious, is coming into town this weekend and we are looking forward to her visit. laura always brings a ray of sunshine. she and i have been friends for a long time and we have some crazy memories together - like sleeping in her bed under the stars and driving on the golf course in south dakota. good times. should i be scared that she gets in on halloween - and that she might get off the plane in some wild costume? oh well, we've come to expect the best in each other!
Troy has been doing an amazing job on the house. he cleaned the closet doors and he did a great job! they had years of dirt and muck and spider webs embedded into them. they look so much better now. he's learned the secret is krud kutter. vesty is really beginning to take shape. can't wait to continue to see its transformation as the year progresses.
talked to my parents last night. they are both sicker than a dog. (not sure where that phrase came to be, but decided to use it!) mom has a terrible head cold with a horrible headache, and dad was barfing during our 5 minute phone conversation. nothing like being sick together. so far troy and i have been sick at different times which i think works out a whole lot better. by the way, he's feeling much better and is back to work now.
my dad got a new job on monday. he's working for wilson trailers. it sounds like a pretty decent company to work for, and he's glad to have left the last company. grateful for this new opportunity for change. my mom is still working for the the school system in sioux falls. they also help out at their church with a little custodial work during the nights.
my friend, lauracious, is coming into town this weekend and we are looking forward to her visit. laura always brings a ray of sunshine. she and i have been friends for a long time and we have some crazy memories together - like sleeping in her bed under the stars and driving on the golf course in south dakota. good times. should i be scared that she gets in on halloween - and that she might get off the plane in some wild costume? oh well, we've come to expect the best in each other!
Troy has been doing an amazing job on the house. he cleaned the closet doors and he did a great job! they had years of dirt and muck and spider webs embedded into them. they look so much better now. he's learned the secret is krud kutter. vesty is really beginning to take shape. can't wait to continue to see its transformation as the year progresses.
talked to my parents last night. they are both sicker than a dog. (not sure where that phrase came to be, but decided to use it!) mom has a terrible head cold with a horrible headache, and dad was barfing during our 5 minute phone conversation. nothing like being sick together. so far troy and i have been sick at different times which i think works out a whole lot better. by the way, he's feeling much better and is back to work now.
my dad got a new job on monday. he's working for wilson trailers. it sounds like a pretty decent company to work for, and he's glad to have left the last company. grateful for this new opportunity for change. my mom is still working for the the school system in sioux falls. they also help out at their church with a little custodial work during the nights.
a beautiful weekend
friday:
troy and i hosted a little get together with some our friends on friday night. it was a dress-up party. i'll have to post some pictures later because they are on troy's camera. let's just say that we had a good time with our friends. it was an informal meeting; just sat around the table. it was hard on my sides; we laughed so hard and so long. we were glad to enjoy some good laughter with friends. super excited Troy was around to enjoy the party also. the phrase that came out of the night is: 'That's cool. That's Kentucky.'
saturday:we had a lazy morning, loafing around the house. went on a date lunch to Chili's. Spent some time talking at the park. Between Troy's random schedule and moving to Vesty, we've not had a weekend to relax in about 6 or 7 weeks. on saturday, Troy was supposed to have a trip to Tampa, but before he left for atlanta, he called the freight company, only to find out they had canceled the trip. (that was pretty exciting for me.) I've missed having a full weekend for just Troy and I to hang out and re-connect. With him being gone 3-4 nights a week, one being the weekend night, it has put a strain on our relationship. Probably I need to be more specific; it has put a strain on my side of the relationship. When I'm the one sitting at home, it causes me to be not as thrilled regarding Troy's job. It's easy for me to get down on Troy because of our lack of communication since he's gone so much. There's something amazingly reassuring by having him fall asleep next to me, and to be able to wake up next to him.
After finding out about his canceled trip, we decided to get out of the house. We took a little trip to a fabric store, then out to one of our favorite dinner locations: huddle house on cobb parkway. we got home in time to watch the 2nd half of the Florida football game. Go Gators - chalking up another win.
sunday:After finding out about his canceled trip, we decided to get out of the house. We took a little trip to a fabric store, then out to one of our favorite dinner locations: huddle house on cobb parkway. we got home in time to watch the 2nd half of the Florida football game. Go Gators - chalking up another win.
we played the role as secret shoppers on sunday morning. liked the experience, much different than what we're used to. heated up left over chili for lunch, which hit the spot on nascar and dallas cowboys vs. atlanta falcons game day. took a long nap. woke up in time to see denny hamlin pull off a win. headed over to our pastor's house for a meal with some volunteers from our guest services members. had a good time discussing church stuff.
and that's about it for the weekend. i was awakened to having bad dreams last night. proceeded to wake troy up to pray with me, cuz i was pretty freaked from my dreams. it was the type of dream where you wake up scared, get calmed down, only to fall right back into the dream. it continued several times like that before i finally woke Troy up. think i've been watching too much news, seeing too many scary costume ads on tv, and hearing too much about kids being abused or killed. hopefully the dreams will not return any time soon.Bugs and a Party
Troy's been wrestling with a gnarly bug since last Saturday. He thought he was about over it, but this morning it has returned with a vengeance. We ate lunch together, but he's looking a little rough. Hopefully he's able to beat this thing soon.
We had a doctor's appointment on Wednesday. So glad Troy was able to go with me to see photos of the baby. The Lil' Tater wouldn't stop moving long enough to take the photos. Go figure! It's pretty cool to see the kid bouncing all over inside, even though it's only about 2.5" long. It's about the size of a matchbox car. Everything seems to be progressing very well. And some good news, I'm feeling so much better. Think the morning/evening sickness has finally moved on and I'm able to hold down my dinner. It makes a world of difference when I feel well. Now I can start to be excited about this Lil' Tater.
It's a rainy day today. Could go for some vanilla ice cream from DQ. That sounds tasty.
We had a doctor's appointment on Wednesday. So glad Troy was able to go with me to see photos of the baby. The Lil' Tater wouldn't stop moving long enough to take the photos. Go figure! It's pretty cool to see the kid bouncing all over inside, even though it's only about 2.5" long. It's about the size of a matchbox car. Everything seems to be progressing very well. And some good news, I'm feeling so much better. Think the morning/evening sickness has finally moved on and I'm able to hold down my dinner. It makes a world of difference when I feel well. Now I can start to be excited about this Lil' Tater.
It's a rainy day today. Could go for some vanilla ice cream from DQ. That sounds tasty.
Feedback for Another Day
Since I've not blogged for awhile, I've lost most of my regular readers. I
have to admit that sometimes it's great getting some feedback from my posts.
But then I'm reminded why I blog: to vent, rant, rave, express, or simply
journal what has been going on in my life. Sometimes blogging has helped me
stay on a good track with my spiritual discipline of digging into God's
Word. Sometimes it's provided a place to express my concerns. Sometimes it
has offered a place for others to connect with me. I specifically remember
those posts when I was living in Africa, and people were hanging on my next
post, waiting patiently for me to tell of my beautiful adventures.
have to admit that sometimes it's great getting some feedback from my posts.
But then I'm reminded why I blog: to vent, rant, rave, express, or simply
journal what has been going on in my life. Sometimes blogging has helped me
stay on a good track with my spiritual discipline of digging into God's
Word. Sometimes it's provided a place to express my concerns. Sometimes it
has offered a place for others to connect with me. I specifically remember
those posts when I was living in Africa, and people were hanging on my next
post, waiting patiently for me to tell of my beautiful adventures.
So what beautiful adventures have I been trekking upon lately? I guess
buying a house and traveling down the road of pregnancy has been somewhat of
a beautiful adventure. Most though to be completely honest, those two
adventure haven't really brought me much bliss. I've been pretty sick with
the pregnancy so that has definitely caused some ill feelings regarding the
joy of carrying a baby. And you top that with the stress of buying a house,
cleaning the house, packing and moving into the house, living out of boxes
while the house gets painted. And that's where we still are: living out of
boxes while the house gets painted. I keep telling myself that maybe tonight
I'll feel like doing something with the house, but that just doesn't seem to
happen during the evenings. I get home from working all day and the last
thing I want to do is try to put down contact paper for the cabinets. This
pregnancy has caused me to be exceptionally tired, and my morning sickness
starts about 6 at night and last until I fall asleep. It's been an
interesting journey with Vesty and the kid.
Looking forward to this weekend.
testing
testing how this things works with some email accounts and not with others. I don't quite understand but that's just life. Maybe one day I can be smart enough to figure it out.
Updates on Vesty
Vesty is slowing becoming our home. We've nearly finished painting in the living room, dining room and master bedroom. After we're finished painting those room, we'll be one step closer to getting the boxes unpacked and the house becoming settled. As it is, we are sleeping on a mattress on the floor in the pink room. We're using the upstairs bathroom for the time being, until we can unpack our clothes in the master bedroom. It's been mostly like camping for 2 weeks.
We have a party coming up next weekend, so we'll be pushing hard to clear the house by then. It's a good thing to have some timelines.
Speaking of timelines, our church will be moving to a new location on the first of November. Hopefully that transition will go more smoothly than our house.
Work has been pretty slow lately. Hoping it picks up in the next couple of weeks. The temps are supposed to drop this weekend, so that should offer a few furnace calls. We're also pushing some advertising both on TV and the radio.
Beginning to pray for someone who I'm gearing up to ask to our church. Praying she's open to coming, and perhaps even her husband. Would be great for them to get involved. They're great people and I can see so much potential in their service.
So glad that Burke and Jamie are coming thru this operation with flying colors. Burke offered his kidney to Jamie because hers was faulty. Now it's a healing process for both of them.
One more thing I'm seriously praying about: Troy to find a job where he could be home every night. His schedule has been ridiculous the last couple of weeks. Would love for him to have a steady income, also.
Vesty is Ours!
Finally, after some delaying, Vesty is finally ours! We closed on the house this afternoon. So now i'm back in the wide world of debt. bliss.
if anyone is willing to swing a paintbrush, trim some bushes, or knows how to install garage door openers - we are welcome to some services!
Thanks for all the prayers, thoughts and kind words during this journey.
Oh yeah, and we are expecting a little mtoto, bambino, kiddo (baby) in about 7 months.
if anyone is willing to swing a paintbrush, trim some bushes, or knows how to install garage door openers - we are welcome to some services!
Thanks for all the prayers, thoughts and kind words during this journey.
Oh yeah, and we are expecting a little mtoto, bambino, kiddo (baby) in about 7 months.
list
troy challenged me today to write down 10 things i'm grateful for:
1.) glad i have enough money in my account to travel to a foreign country and not have to return for a very long time.
2.) that's all i can think of so far...
1.) glad i have enough money in my account to travel to a foreign country and not have to return for a very long time.
2.) that's all i can think of so far...
timing and sorrow
several things in my life feel out of sync.
i was going to write about how timing feels to linger... then my mind was
filled with a verse which i love and cherish. the verse is Habakkuk 2.3 'For
the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not
prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will
not delay.' guess that's more confirmation that waiting is a good thing;
that patience has its place in this fast-paced world. and i'm not getting my
way, right away, and i'm throwing a tantrum. i want to have more answers, i
want for the bank to make their decision on this house, i want for the
appraiser to get back to us about any extra repairs, i want to know about a
job opportunity for troy, i want to not have to deal with insurance
companies, etc. don't get me started about ex-wives, job changes, loser
ebay-ers, feeling frozen at work, or finances.
there was my rant.
life is just a little overwhelming sometimes.
...a time to search and a time to give up.
...a time to keep and time to throw away.
...a time to kill and a time to heal.
...a time to tear down and a time to build.
...a time to be silent and a time to speak.
...a time to love and a time to hate.
- from ecclesiastes 3
in my daily devotion today it made this statement: 'Discouragement is
disillusioned self-love, and self-love may be love for my devotion to Jesus
-- not love for Jesus Himself.'
Our Father in Heaven,
reveal areas in our lives where we feel discouraged so that You may enter
into those areas with Your redeeming love. give us the grace to let go of
the self-love and grasp onto obedience to You. don't let us remain in our
selfishness any longer. take our lives and let them be, consecrated, Lord to
thee.
i was going to write about how timing feels to linger... then my mind was
filled with a verse which i love and cherish. the verse is Habakkuk 2.3 'For
the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not
prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will
not delay.' guess that's more confirmation that waiting is a good thing;
that patience has its place in this fast-paced world. and i'm not getting my
way, right away, and i'm throwing a tantrum. i want to have more answers, i
want for the bank to make their decision on this house, i want for the
appraiser to get back to us about any extra repairs, i want to know about a
job opportunity for troy, i want to not have to deal with insurance
companies, etc. don't get me started about ex-wives, job changes, loser
ebay-ers, feeling frozen at work, or finances.
there was my rant.
life is just a little overwhelming sometimes.
...a time to search and a time to give up.
...a time to keep and time to throw away.
...a time to kill and a time to heal.
...a time to tear down and a time to build.
...a time to be silent and a time to speak.
...a time to love and a time to hate.
- from ecclesiastes 3
in my daily devotion today it made this statement: 'Discouragement is
disillusioned self-love, and self-love may be love for my devotion to Jesus
-- not love for Jesus Himself.'
Our Father in Heaven,
reveal areas in our lives where we feel discouraged so that You may enter
into those areas with Your redeeming love. give us the grace to let go of
the self-love and grasp onto obedience to You. don't let us remain in our
selfishness any longer. take our lives and let them be, consecrated, Lord to
thee.
Just Stuff
troy and i have lots going on in our lives, yet it's surprisingly peaceful.
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition,
with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which
transcends all understanding,will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ
Jesus. Phil. 4.6-7
Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.
Each day has enough trouble of its own. Matt. 6.34
But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will
be given to you as well. Matt. 6.31
And I will do whatever you ask in my name, so that the Son may bring glory
to the Father. You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.
John 14.13-14
I'm at the place in several areas of my life where all i can do is kneel
before the altar of God and proclaim, 'God, i don't know what to do. I can't
change the situation before me, but i know You can. Please reveal Yourself
thru this situation. I'm surrendering to Your lordship.' and somehow, some
way He continues to do that - reveals Himself over and over in a mighty and
powerful way. there's something about knowing there's nothing i can do, yet
He is able, which gives me strength and peace. like tithing - even though
financially it does not make sense to give away money in order to be
financial more stable, some how when we tithe we have less money troubles
that when we don't. God-onomics.
Taking it to the Lord
We wait in hope for the Lord; he is our help and our shield. In him
our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name. May your unfailing love
rest upon us, O Lord, even as we put our hope in you. Ps. 33.20-22
our hearts rejoice, for we trust in his holy name. May your unfailing love
rest upon us, O Lord, even as we put our hope in you. Ps. 33.20-22
Every now and then God lays out a plan and sees if i will trust Him to make
it happen. This house deal is one of those plans. So far everything has been
laid perfectly. From the realtor, to lendors, to credit scores, to finding
the house, to what is to come. Yet there are some aspects which need a
miracle. We have to have an appraiser in the next 3 days so that we can get
this FHA loan. Financially we might need a miracle, too. It's a little scary
writing out $500 in checks to inspectors.
Yet I wake up in the morning hearing that small voice in my head asking me,
'Do you trust me?'. I hope at the end of the day, i will be able to say,
'yes'. I want to live my life in such a way that others realize i trust God.
hello
as i'm sitting here looking out my office window, i'm overwhelmed by how
loved i am.
i am loved by an amazing husband who likes spending time with me, who
challenges me to grow in my faith, who loves our kids deeply, who makes me
smile and laugh, who is willing to step out and take some chances, who's
adventurous, and who happens to be the most kind man i know.
i am loved by all my parents, especially my mom and dad gartamaker. they are
constantly offering support and encouragement, even in the midst of their
trials. currently my mom may have a fractured wrist and my dad is in the
midst of finding a new job - yet each time they call me - they offer cheer
and joy. they are already planning their next trip back to GA, displaying
eagerness to help us with our next endeavor. their faith and perserverance
throughout their lives have demonstrated wonderful character. i have great
parents who love my kids, my husband and cherish moments with me. my heart
overflows with gratitude for being their daughter. also, i can't speak
highly enough for my moms and dad whom i've married into. they've taken me
in as their daughter, offering hugs, support, and great food. troy and i
didn't give them much time to adjust to having a new daughter-in-law, but
they didn't need time. they all were waiting with open arms for someone to
love their son.
God has blessed me with incredible friends who offer cheer, support, comfort
and simple friendship. we don't paint on smiles when we are down - we just
are down together. we cherish time and each other's friendship. with the
technology with have today, i'm chatting on messenger, getting text
messages, phone calls, facebook messages, and emails on a daily basis from
them. it is great to have that kind of support system. they don't allow me
to go a day without sharing their concern for me. i adore them all.
so i give gratitude to the Lord Almighty for allowing me to have this
wonderful life. He's blessed me with the people who make my life worth
living. my heart overflows with much joy, laughter and cheer when i think
about all the crazy times i've had with these wonderful friends and family.
Cheers to many more cherished memories!
loved i am.
i am loved by an amazing husband who likes spending time with me, who
challenges me to grow in my faith, who loves our kids deeply, who makes me
smile and laugh, who is willing to step out and take some chances, who's
adventurous, and who happens to be the most kind man i know.
i am loved by all my parents, especially my mom and dad gartamaker. they are
constantly offering support and encouragement, even in the midst of their
trials. currently my mom may have a fractured wrist and my dad is in the
midst of finding a new job - yet each time they call me - they offer cheer
and joy. they are already planning their next trip back to GA, displaying
eagerness to help us with our next endeavor. their faith and perserverance
throughout their lives have demonstrated wonderful character. i have great
parents who love my kids, my husband and cherish moments with me. my heart
overflows with gratitude for being their daughter. also, i can't speak
highly enough for my moms and dad whom i've married into. they've taken me
in as their daughter, offering hugs, support, and great food. troy and i
didn't give them much time to adjust to having a new daughter-in-law, but
they didn't need time. they all were waiting with open arms for someone to
love their son.
God has blessed me with incredible friends who offer cheer, support, comfort
and simple friendship. we don't paint on smiles when we are down - we just
are down together. we cherish time and each other's friendship. with the
technology with have today, i'm chatting on messenger, getting text
messages, phone calls, facebook messages, and emails on a daily basis from
them. it is great to have that kind of support system. they don't allow me
to go a day without sharing their concern for me. i adore them all.
so i give gratitude to the Lord Almighty for allowing me to have this
wonderful life. He's blessed me with the people who make my life worth
living. my heart overflows with much joy, laughter and cheer when i think
about all the crazy times i've had with these wonderful friends and family.
Cheers to many more cherished memories!
B-day Fandango
Had a great day with Troy's family on Saturday. see photos:
This might be our future house:
It will need some TLC in the landscaping department.
I love the wrap around porch which 1/2 is covered and 1/2 is uncovered.
journal, budgeting and discipline
i'm most productive when i know what is expected of me. i guess in some ways that makes me a follower - just tell me what to do so i can accomplish it. that's why i have a planner where i can list my daily tasks, thoughts, prayer requests and how much money i've spent that day. i must be pretty trendy cuz it's a real moleskine. (actually denise gave it to me cuz it wasn't meeting her needs.) my lil' black book's name is Moja. so far it's working out very well for me. i basically have 4 sections to Moja:
Challenge Question - see this link
Calendar - print out of my my google calendar
Daily tasks, prayer requests and random thoughts
Expenses
Troy and i were discussing 'satisfaction' last night, and the question arose, 'can someone be satisfied by another person?' what are your thoughts? that's a big question, and i'm struggling with the answer. i realize that the Lord placed Troy in my life to fill a void, a longing to have a companion for travels along life's road. yet, me, as a person created in the image of God, has more needs than simply having a traveling companion. i don't simply want for my husband to only be my friend. i expect more than that from him. i had lots of guy friends before i got married, but they weren't my husband. perhaps i'm struggling with the definition of marriage. perhaps my idea of what marriage was supposed to be was tainted. troy being gone 3-4 nights a week causes me to be unsatisfied. so does that mean i'm relying too much on him? am i looking for him to fill something in me which he wasn't designed to fulfill? oh so many questions in my soul.
[Prov. 13.4 The sluggard craves and gets nothing, but the desires of the diligent are fully satisfied.] this is my verse for today. makes me think about what i'm doing to change my unhappiness/unsatisfied life. am on on my knees, crying out to the God of the universe who can fill all the desires of my soul? am i working out my salvation with fear and trembling, or am i complaining about not getting what i want? do i have a spirit of gratitude? where in my life do i need to be more diligent for those whom i cherish? what would satisfy me?
i'm kinda going thru a phase in my life when i'm unsatisfied in lots of areas. not connected to Troy, friends, church, family, don't have anything fun planned for the future. too much work and not enough play. going through the motions by not really accomplishing anything worthwhile. i realize this too shall pass, but in the midst of this tunnel, it feels lonely, cold, damp and dark. yet i know i'm not alone.
center aisle by caedmon's call seems to be the song which keeps playing over and over in my mind.
one of my daily challenge questions keeps rolling through my mind:
did i practice undisciplined or addictive behavior?
organize
Reading from My Utmost for His Highest this morning and came across this quote:
'Sin is blatant mutiny against God, and either sin or God must die in my life. The New Testament brings us right down to this one issue— if sin rules in me, God's life in me will be killed; if God rules in me, sin in me will be killed. There is nothing more fundamental than that.'
that phrase, 'either sin or God must die in my life' is very strong dialect. am i waging war in my life to kill sin, or am i standing on the fence - allowing the hidden, dark secrets to evade my thoughts? what am i spending time thinking about, watching on tv, seeing on the net? is God real in me? am I allowing him time/space in my life to make a difference? is He getting my best, or am i giving it to another? am i allowing my affections for Christ to shine throughout my life, or do i hide them so that i will not be embarrassed when others are looking? am i truly working for the Lord when I'm busy at DHR, or do i work for my own ambition? am i serving Troy in an honorable way which expresses my great love for Christ? can my family see i'm passionate about honoring Jesus? am i submitting to Troy out of reverence for Christ, or am i inhibited by my rebellion? do i keep a close watch on the ways i spend my hard earned cash, or do i buy frivolous things to fill a void in my life? am i allowing God sufficient room to move in other's lives, or am i trying to control their every move? do i trust God enough to move in the lives of my family members, so that their hearts choose to trust God's way? am i laying down my cross on a daily basis, accepting that God is able to change hearts, minds and habits? am i'm asking God to reveal the sin in my heart so i can draw nearer to Him? am i willing to make the changes in my life to break the habits which have held me captive for so long?pink and blue glasses/hearing aids
i'm reading a book called cracking the communication code by Emerson Eggerichs. so far it's been a thrill to read. most of the time i don't mark up books (cuz i choose to re-sell them) but this one has marks, highlights, writing of all sorts in it,and i'm only on page 56. it creates some great conversation for Troy and me. today's discussion was about how men and women hear and understand things differently.
If a two women are discussing 'excess oil', they are having concerns about their skin. If men are discussing 'excess oil', they have concerns about machinery or perhaps a slippery garage floor.
If a women says, 'I have nothing to wear', she's referring to having nothing new to wear, but if a guy says, 'I have nothing to wear', he's referring to not having any clean clothes.
If a women hears the words, 'Let's go shopping', she thinks, 'How wonderful!' yet if a man hears, 'Let's go shopping', he thinks, 'How can I get out of this?'
If a women says, 'I have nothing to wear', she's referring to having nothing new to wear, but if a guy says, 'I have nothing to wear', he's referring to not having any clean clothes.
If a women hears the words, 'Let's go shopping', she thinks, 'How wonderful!' yet if a man hears, 'Let's go shopping', he thinks, 'How can I get out of this?'
another week
let's see, what's been going on in my world the last couple of days...
i've started using my day planner/journal again. it definitely keeps me on track with what i need to accomplish every day - what to expect and some how spiritually i'm more like to read scripture and pray. i need the structure it offers. today i was reading in proverbs 18 and 2 verse jumped out at me. verse nine says, 'One who is slack in his work is brother to one who destroys.' last month we were overly slow; this month we are swamped. so trying to find the balance there. also, verse sixteen says, 'a gift opens the way for the giver and ushers him into the presence of the great.' when i was in Mkata, Tanzania i used the verse to offer a message. too often i'm wrapped up in the 'give me' mentality when it comes tp the Lord and my life. that verse challenges me to think about what gift am i giving back. what gifts are ushering me into the presence of the great? what gift do i have or can attend which will open a way for me? so being faithful in our tithing is one of them, but also, looking for opportunities to give.
which leads me to something else: the word 'give'. that word keeps causing me to stop and ponder the greatness of its meaning. to give up, give in, give to others.
My sis and bro in-law are leaving for their trip to Honduras in a few days. they are going to be blown away at the greatness of God. their gift of submission/obedience is leading them into the presence of the great. can't wait to hear stories of their adventure!
troy and i are thinking of getting a new to us (used) car, in exchange for Clifford, our big red truck. i tried to get some financing yesterday, but because i've done the dave ramsey plan and gotten rid of all my debt, i was declined credit. they said i don't have any activity on my credit report for 3 years. so now we are praying/seeking God wisdom on how to move forward. not sure a loan may be the answer... crazy how i went with cash in hand, and they still declined me credit. what is his america coming to?
i've started using my day planner/journal again. it definitely keeps me on track with what i need to accomplish every day - what to expect and some how spiritually i'm more like to read scripture and pray. i need the structure it offers. today i was reading in proverbs 18 and 2 verse jumped out at me. verse nine says, 'One who is slack in his work is brother to one who destroys.' last month we were overly slow; this month we are swamped. so trying to find the balance there. also, verse sixteen says, 'a gift opens the way for the giver and ushers him into the presence of the great.' when i was in Mkata, Tanzania i used the verse to offer a message. too often i'm wrapped up in the 'give me' mentality when it comes tp the Lord and my life. that verse challenges me to think about what gift am i giving back. what gifts are ushering me into the presence of the great? what gift do i have or can attend which will open a way for me? so being faithful in our tithing is one of them, but also, looking for opportunities to give.
which leads me to something else: the word 'give'. that word keeps causing me to stop and ponder the greatness of its meaning. to give up, give in, give to others.
In the same way, any of you who does not give up everything he has cannot be my disciple. Luke 14.33
Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives birth to spirit. John 3.6
Jesus replied, "They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat." Matt. 14.13
Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Luke 6.30
'Live to Love; Give to Live' - that phrase keeps circulating around my mind... i think of it nearly every day. i keep wondering if it should be: 'Love to Live; Give to Love', but i keep coming back to the original. Love to live is probably more of literal translation, but Live to Love brings passion for living. perhaps no one else will get what i'm saying, but at least i'm trying to communicate what's been floating around my head lately.Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives birth to spirit. John 3.6
Jesus replied, "They do not need to go away. You give them something to eat." Matt. 14.13
Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. Luke 6.30
My sis and bro in-law are leaving for their trip to Honduras in a few days. they are going to be blown away at the greatness of God. their gift of submission/obedience is leading them into the presence of the great. can't wait to hear stories of their adventure!
troy and i are thinking of getting a new to us (used) car, in exchange for Clifford, our big red truck. i tried to get some financing yesterday, but because i've done the dave ramsey plan and gotten rid of all my debt, i was declined credit. they said i don't have any activity on my credit report for 3 years. so now we are praying/seeking God wisdom on how to move forward. not sure a loan may be the answer... crazy how i went with cash in hand, and they still declined me credit. what is his america coming to?
monday mind dump
had a great weekend. didn't really do a whole lot of anything, but enjoyed being a complete slacker, test driving some new cars, conversing a great deal with troy, visiting an ill relative who is in the hospital, having dinner with my in-laws, waffle house, some shopping, and so much more nothingness. we also knocked a few tasks off our list: haircuts and contacts for troy.
loved my surprise visit by my friend, lindsay, on friday. i love having visitors. there something special about entertaining guests, even if that means for 5 minutes. thanks lindsay for stopping in to drop off the missing stamp. denise picked it up on sunday.
my heart is breaking for a local church going thru a major crisis.
looking forward to my parents and uncle visiting in a several weeks. they are coming for the 4th of july. it's gonna be a houseful, but it will be great.
really enjoyed the warm, sunny weather over the weekend. quite a contrast to the weather in south dakota where it snowed this last weekend. i don't miss that.
our office location will soon be moving to our new buiding, so i'm looking forward to that. hoping i can paint my new office some fun color(s). it might be the same green color which it is now. stopped at home depot yesterday, and discovered that i still really like that color.
loved my surprise visit by my friend, lindsay, on friday. i love having visitors. there something special about entertaining guests, even if that means for 5 minutes. thanks lindsay for stopping in to drop off the missing stamp. denise picked it up on sunday.
my heart is breaking for a local church going thru a major crisis.
looking forward to my parents and uncle visiting in a several weeks. they are coming for the 4th of july. it's gonna be a houseful, but it will be great.
really enjoyed the warm, sunny weather over the weekend. quite a contrast to the weather in south dakota where it snowed this last weekend. i don't miss that.
our office location will soon be moving to our new buiding, so i'm looking forward to that. hoping i can paint my new office some fun color(s). it might be the same green color which it is now. stopped at home depot yesterday, and discovered that i still really like that color.
crazy randomness
Troy has been out of town since Tuesday and won't get back until late tonight. it's weird having him be gone that much. i've enjoyed him being around at least 5 nights a week.
i randomly call people (who love me) in the morning in order for them to come to my non-reality farm on facebook in order for them to harvest my crops. i get more coins if they harvest instead of me. frauke and kimberly love getting early morning calls from me. watch out denise.
google calendar now offers a task list. it's a beautiful thing. i've gotten more accomplished in the last couple of days because of it. i can't stand leaving items on my list. it's kinda like my desk at the end of the day - i NEED to clean it off or i can't leave work. I currently have 4 items on my list: enter payables, cert. of liability updates, get mail, and mail out address change letters to customers and vendors. joy! (and this blog post, too!)
stopped at the library on my way home last night. checked out 3 books. started reading all of them. i have been reading 2 other books, also. now all 5 books content is getting all mixed up in my mind, and i don't know which book offered which quotes. good times. should just stick with one or two books at a time. makes for interesting discussions for Troy and me, that's for sure.
nearly every time i answer the phone this morning, it's a problem to be solved. my supervisor is out of town today, so i'm left to make the decisions. good times. one call offered a credit to our company, so i told that lady that she deserved the employee of the day award. she just laughed.
love it when i wake up thanking God for the life He's blessed me with. makes for a beautiful morning.
hate waking up in the middle of the night from a dream with my heart/mind filled with doubts and fear. perhaps i have more insecurities than i want to admit.
our office could be recorded and be aired on NBC 'the office'. cyndi walks by my office and says some random word, then i finish the thought. for instance: she walks by and says, 'useless', then i finish by saying, 'all of them'. this goes on all day long. i wonder what the whole stories is behind our little comments. one could not even imagine...
i randomly call people (who love me) in the morning in order for them to come to my non-reality farm on facebook in order for them to harvest my crops. i get more coins if they harvest instead of me. frauke and kimberly love getting early morning calls from me. watch out denise.
google calendar now offers a task list. it's a beautiful thing. i've gotten more accomplished in the last couple of days because of it. i can't stand leaving items on my list. it's kinda like my desk at the end of the day - i NEED to clean it off or i can't leave work. I currently have 4 items on my list: enter payables, cert. of liability updates, get mail, and mail out address change letters to customers and vendors. joy! (and this blog post, too!)
stopped at the library on my way home last night. checked out 3 books. started reading all of them. i have been reading 2 other books, also. now all 5 books content is getting all mixed up in my mind, and i don't know which book offered which quotes. good times. should just stick with one or two books at a time. makes for interesting discussions for Troy and me, that's for sure.
nearly every time i answer the phone this morning, it's a problem to be solved. my supervisor is out of town today, so i'm left to make the decisions. good times. one call offered a credit to our company, so i told that lady that she deserved the employee of the day award. she just laughed.
love it when i wake up thanking God for the life He's blessed me with. makes for a beautiful morning.
hate waking up in the middle of the night from a dream with my heart/mind filled with doubts and fear. perhaps i have more insecurities than i want to admit.
our office could be recorded and be aired on NBC 'the office'. cyndi walks by my office and says some random word, then i finish the thought. for instance: she walks by and says, 'useless', then i finish by saying, 'all of them'. this goes on all day long. i wonder what the whole stories is behind our little comments. one could not even imagine...
learning curve
our marriage continues to be a learning curve for me.
Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Eph. 5.22-33
3 basic lessons:
Growing up with an alcoholic brother and dysfunctional family certainly plays a part in the why and how i am the way i am. yet i'm proud to say that my parents endured those difficult days. they are not quitters, and neither am i. i'm a fighter through and through - yet i try to fight fair in most circumstances. i don't scream, yell, rant and rave about unnecessary evils, and neither does troy. we are the quiet fighters. we are learning together which way best works for the other person. i work best when Troy just comes straight out and tells me what's bothering him. He needs some coaxing in order to swallow what I have to say. (this is challenging for both of us, since i'm more likely to spew whatever is bothering me, and he is more likely to beat around the bush or to not speak at all.) we are growing and learning together, and it's getting easier with time. we are figuring out together what works, and that's what i'm learning marriage is about.
letting go of 'i/me' and grasping onto 'we/us'.
tomorrow: 18 months from when i received my first email from Troy. it's been a beautiful adventure ever since.
Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Eph. 5.22-33
'submit to your husband as to the Lord.'
'submit to your husband in everything.'
'respect your husband.'
God currently has me enrolled in the school of hard knocks. It's a combination of acupuncture, kickboxing, and open heart surgery. perhaps i could throw in some skin grafting and bull riding for good measure. and yet, somehow in the midst of this wild ride, there is an amazing sense of peace and joy. i know beyond any doubt that God designed Troy for me. daily i see God move through Troy to teach me another lesson on love, endurance, passion, hope, kindness, comfort, etc., along with tearing down my fractured image of what love and marriage should be. God is revealing my subconscious images of broken past relationships with my family and others. I'm learning why i act certain ways regarding lack of money, drinking, intimacy, parenting, and so much more. 'submit to your husband in everything.'
'respect your husband.'
Growing up with an alcoholic brother and dysfunctional family certainly plays a part in the why and how i am the way i am. yet i'm proud to say that my parents endured those difficult days. they are not quitters, and neither am i. i'm a fighter through and through - yet i try to fight fair in most circumstances. i don't scream, yell, rant and rave about unnecessary evils, and neither does troy. we are the quiet fighters. we are learning together which way best works for the other person. i work best when Troy just comes straight out and tells me what's bothering him. He needs some coaxing in order to swallow what I have to say. (this is challenging for both of us, since i'm more likely to spew whatever is bothering me, and he is more likely to beat around the bush or to not speak at all.) we are growing and learning together, and it's getting easier with time. we are figuring out together what works, and that's what i'm learning marriage is about.
letting go of 'i/me' and grasping onto 'we/us'.
And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.
Rom. 5.2b-5
not sure i'm at the point of rejoicing in our sufferings yet, but i know God is with us and in us. Rom. 5.2b-5
tomorrow: 18 months from when i received my first email from Troy. it's been a beautiful adventure ever since.
yurt
The weather was absolutely gorgeous this last weekend - highs in the mid 80's and bright sunshine. And man did we take advantage of it.
Friday night i watch a good friend, allison gantz, walk thru your high school graduation ceremony. i've known allison for about 5 years and have seen her mature into an amazing young women. she'll be attending u of georgia in the fall. i'm so proud of her, and can't wait to see how God is going to use her in the coming years.
saturday morning i had meeting for chyrsalis. the meeting last a bit longer than i had anticipated. Troy and the kids spent most of the day at the pool.
later in the afternon on saturday, denise, steven, cheryl, lacey, jolie, and the boys came over for a little pool get-together. denise grilled some hotdogs. the weather was beautiful. (had i mentioned i'm loving this hot weather?) anyway, it was great hanging out with some friends. i've missed that. Life gets so busy some times, and schedules don't always allow for those moments when we can sit around the pool and discuss life. i'm really glad it worked out this weekend.
after church yesterday, we took our kids hiking around amicalola state park. the falls were rushing with waters. The kids enjoyed playing in the creek. I enjoyed the time being outdoors. It was a lovely day for a hike.
while at the Lodge on top of the mountain at amicalola, i picked up a brochure for the state parks in georgia. and I learned something new while flipping thru it. some state parks offer these sleeping facilities called yurts. now i'm on a mission to convince my husband and friends to join me for a night in a yurt. they hold 6 people and costs about 50 bucks. the joy of a yurt comes in not having to drag your grill, camper, tent, etc. to the campsite. your house is basically already set up for you, and you simply take food and blankets. that's just beautiful.
cool weekend
On Friday i was able to go trucking with Troy. We drove through some lovely
Friday afternoon (holiday weekend) traffic. I'm not meant to be driver. If i
were, I'm afraid i may be overcome with roadrage. Anyway, back to story. So
traveling with troy is good for our relationship because we have nothing to
do but to talk. It allowed both of us to drop some of the guards we've both
put up and share what was resting on our hearts. Troy is a great thinker,
truly an introvert. Definitely a 'think-do-think' person, and I often times
fall under the 'do-think-do' catergory. He tends to over think everything,
and I tend to just do things, then think about the consequences. And yet
somehow it all works out beautifully on this adventure together.
Friday afternoon (holiday weekend) traffic. I'm not meant to be driver. If i
were, I'm afraid i may be overcome with roadrage. Anyway, back to story. So
traveling with troy is good for our relationship because we have nothing to
do but to talk. It allowed both of us to drop some of the guards we've both
put up and share what was resting on our hearts. Troy is a great thinker,
truly an introvert. Definitely a 'think-do-think' person, and I often times
fall under the 'do-think-do' catergory. He tends to over think everything,
and I tend to just do things, then think about the consequences. And yet
somehow it all works out beautifully on this adventure together.
Friday we delivered the freight about midnight thirty. While Troy was
taking care of the paperwork, I was trying to catch a few winks of sleep,
but it's pretty hard when the canisters are being moved around in the
trailer. After being unloaded we drove another 25 minutes to a truck stop in
Lebanon Junction. We were so tired by the time we go there. I admit, I'm not
a night owl. I got a new phrase this weekend from a friend a Troy named
John, 'i'm a solar person' = i function best during the daylight hours. I
hadn't heard that phrase before, but that pretty much sums me up.
On Saturday we got up about 9.30. The hardest part for me when I'm trucking
with Troy is that we don't have a shower. I'm so used to getting up,
dragging myself to the shower, and waking up as the hot water hits my body.
It's not the same without a shower. Baby wipes just don't cut it. But one
thing was good, we had McD's for breakfast, and they had bagels. Not sure
why some of the McD's are getting rid of the bagels, but those are my
favorites.
As we were getting close to Bowling Green, Troy and I started talking about
the National Corvette Museum <http://www.corvettemuseum.com/> . He had
pointed it out on the way on Friday, but we didn't really discuss much about
it. After some convincing, Troy consented to going with me to check out some
sweet rides. The Museum was really cool. Enjoyed seeing the old cars, the
new cars, and some history behind them. It's well worth the price of the
ticket to stop in and visit. I highly recommend it to anyone with any
interest in cars.
Troy was telling me a story about John, a good friend of his from Texas, who
once tried to convince Troy to stop and visit the Corvette Museum with him,
but Troy had other obligations at the time. I tried to call John, but his
voicemail came on right away. A few minutes later, John called back. Troy
and he were talking for a while, then Troy asked, 'Where are you?' John
responded that he was near Nashville and heading north. It turned out we
were about 30 minutes away from each other. We all met at Cracker Barrell
and enjoyed some good food and great conversation. John pulled out his phone
and was showing us lots of pictures of his family and house. It was fun
meeting John in person, after talking with him a couple of times on the
phone.
After a couple of hours it was time for all of us to get back on the
highway. Troy and I headed south, and John continued north. But our time on
the highway didn't last that long. We drove for about 1.5 hours before I
managed to convince Troy that we should get a hotel for the night. I love
staying in hotels. Hotels bring back some good memories for me. We called
ahead to a motel in Mancheter, TN, to get the prices, availability, and if
they had truck parking. First one i called had all three, so that was my
answer. I went inside the motel to see where they wanted Troy to park his
truck. It's not always the easiest thing to find places for an 18 wheeler.
The lady at the counter told me that we could park our truck in front of the
hotel. So i looked outside, pointed at Troy and said, 'I need to go and
tell 'that guy' where to park his truck.' As i was walking towards the door,
i realized how trashy that sounded, so i tried to cover my tracks and
responded, ''that guy' is my husband'. The lady just kinda smiled and said,
'uh huh'. It's a really funny story. So now Troy's nickname has become 'that
guy'.
First thing i did was get a shower. How glorious it feels to be clean again.
Kinda like when I first got back from Africa after enduring cold showers and
bucket baths for 6 months. After cleansing my parts, it was time to go
wondering around the community. We visited a little dinner called Wingers
<http://www.wingers.info/menu.html> . Walked over to Wal-Mart
<http://www.walmart.com/> for some intriguing people watching. Walked
through Shell gas station, then back to the hotel for some tv. After about
an hour of TV, I had a hankering for some Huddle House
<http://www.huddlehouse.com/> . There's so much free entertainment at the
Huddle House. Our waitress was going off about some guy who had behaved
poorly. On our walk back to the motel, there were some people wondering
around this old trains depot with their flashlights. I can spot Geocachers a
mile away! So we walked over to them and asked them about the cache. They
had been in town for some geocaching convention called Geowoodstock
<http://www.geowoodstock.com/> . Next year we're gonna try to make that
event happen. it's going to be held somewhere in the northwest. Anyone up
for the challenge?
In the morning we grabbed some complimentary breakfast on the way out to
door. Troy had to get a decent cup of coffee so we took a little walk over
to Starbucks. Then it was time to drive back to Georgia. We got back to the
Troy's office about 2.30.
On the way back to our place, Troy pursuaded me to try some brasilian food.
We stopped at Carne N' Espeto Brazilian Steak House on Delk Road. It's a
buffet and they cook their meat of an open fire. The meat is quite salty,
but very tender. I had some tenderloin and Troy enjoyed the Chicken. They
offer fried plantains, roasted pinapple with cinnamon, and some other really
great foods. It was a cool experience.
Monday morning we attended a Memorial Day ceremony at the National Cemetery
outside of Canton on highway 20. Highlights of the event: 3 huge military
helicopters which flew by twice, bagpipers playing amazing grace, trumpeters
playing tapps, and a firing canon. I'm really glad we dragged outselves out
of bed in order to get to that ceremony.
After the ceremony we drove to Lake Jackson to spend some time with my
in-laws and our kids. Deanna prepared an amazing meal of ribs, bbq chicken,
corn on the cobb, baked beans, etc. it's was a meal fit for a king. My
mom-in-law is a great cook.
We watched the race for a bit after lunch. It was on and off with the rain
delays. The race had been postponed from the night before due to the rain in
Charlotte.
Michael and I walked down on the dock and were fishing for a bit. He had a
line in the water with a worm on it, and i pulled it out of the water to see
if it had any bait left, and when i pulled it out, it had a fish on it. So i
guess i caught a fish. Somewhere Micheal and I were talking about going
swimming. And the next thing i knew he was daring me to jump in. So i
unloaded my pockets and just dove in. He wasn't sure what to say. He
couldn't believe that I jumped in. I had to pursuade him that the water was
warm and that it was ok for him to get into the water, too. Alex and Drew,
my nephew, decided to join us. We had a great time.
Emotions
An excerpt from 'The Healing Choice Guidebook':
Emotions wil not stay buried, except under a blanket of
depression. Stay present in your pain. Do not run from strong emotions, but
allow God to access your wound. Our emotions aren't cured by negating them
or by thinking positive thoughts. We are to bring our thoughts and emotions
to God, giving Him permission to do the supernatural work of healing that
only He can do. Though at times your emotions' intensity may frighten you,
the chaos will calm as you allow God to do the real work of healing.
Emotions wil not stay buried, except under a blanket of
depression. Stay present in your pain. Do not run from strong emotions, but
allow God to access your wound. Our emotions aren't cured by negating them
or by thinking positive thoughts. We are to bring our thoughts and emotions
to God, giving Him permission to do the supernatural work of healing that
only He can do. Though at times your emotions' intensity may frighten you,
the chaos will calm as you allow God to do the real work of healing.
end of the day
At the end of the day...
i lay in bed wondering what i've forgotten to do at work
i ponder how i've failed/pleased the Lord, my husband, my
friends, my family
i straighten the covers so i can climb under and sleep
i usually read something before i fall asleep
i normally thank the Lord for my husband, my kids, and my
blessed life
i revel on the words spoken during the day
i lay in bed wondering what i've forgotten to do at work
i ponder how i've failed/pleased the Lord, my husband, my
friends, my family
i straighten the covers so i can climb under and sleep
i usually read something before i fall asleep
i normally thank the Lord for my husband, my kids, and my
blessed life
i revel on the words spoken during the day
1 versus 2 (or 4)
As a single person, i could update this blog with whatever i wanted to share about myself, because i was the only one who would have to deal with the repercussions. Not so when i acquired a husband and kids. Now i can hardly write about what i’m feeling and struggling with because it might hurt my family. I kinda miss venting and ranting about things – it used to be my release. My heart is bursting to speak, to release some clutter, to flood my feelings onto paper, yet i can’t.
First year of marriage was mostly a smooth ride. Second year has proven to be more mountainous, even though we are only 9 days into it. First year we needed marital counseling out of obligation to get married in a church in south dakota. Second year, i may need counseling to remain sane and uncalloused. The following is an excerpt from His Utmost for My Highest on May 14th:
The only thing that will enable me to enjoy adversity is the acute sense of eagerness of allowing the life of the Son of God to evidence itself in me. No matter how difficult something may be, I must say, "Lord, I am delighted to obey You in this." Instantly, the Son of God will move to the forefront of my life, and will manifest in my body that which glorifies Him.
When my life feels as though it is falling apart, i cling to my Bible, i fast, and i embrace other reading material. My response is not to grab a friend to have a venting party. I become a recluse, a hermit, nearly a troll who doesn’t not want to be bothered. This is when i become an introvert. I visit the dark places of my soul where God finds me, sheds His light on me, and illuminates the path back to humanity. Yet i’m having a hard time, because it’s not just me who needs to have God’s illuminations this time. It’s not just me who needs to turn from darkness and accept grace. If something i’m doing becomes evident that it’s wrong, I can do whatever it takes to change that. But in a relationship, until the revelation of the wrongful actions becomes evident to the other person, change may not liking occur until God intervenes. Waiting for that intervention requires all of me to surrender to Christ.
I’ve been finding solstice in these verses from Psalm 139:
1 O LORD, you have searched me and you know me.
2 You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar.
3 You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways.
4 Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O LORD.
5 You hem me in—behind and before; you have laid your hand upon me.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.
7 Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence?
8 If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
9 If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea,
10 even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast.
11 If I say, "Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,"
12 even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.
13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
16 your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.
17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God! How vast is the sum of them!
18 Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand. When I awake, I am still with you.
19 If only you would slay the wicked, O God! Away from me, you bloodthirsty men!
20 They speak of you with evil intent; your adversaries misuse your name.
21 Do I not hate those who hate you, O LORD, and abhor those who rise up against you?
22 I have nothing but hatred for them; I count them my enemies.
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.
playlist
Today’s song playlist:
Calling for a Flood – John Waller
Beg – Shane & Shane
The Long Defeat – Sara Groves
Loving a Person – Sara Groves
I Will Rise – Chris Tomlin
While I’m Waiting – John Waller
He’s Always Been Faithful – Sara Groves
learning about love
Through my relationship with Troy, my definition of ‘love’ has greatly increased.
As he and i were laying in bed talking at 5.30 this morning, i was pondering a few of things i’ve learned thru him.
Love can feel heavy
Love is gentle
Love can be hard
Love expects patience
Love gives, takes and hopes for the best
Love is comoforting
Love encourages growth
Love is holding hands during an argument
Love says we will get thru this together
Love is a hug after a spanking
Love sees past the pain to what can be
Love is kind
Love is a smile that melts away hurt
Love lets go of the past failures
Love speaks when we want to run and hide
Love doesn’t give up
Love expects God’s best for people
Love doesn’t have rants
Love endures much
Love may be jealous at times
Love breeds more love
Love is not self-seeking
Love covers over a multitude of sins
Love protects
Love trusts
Love hopes
Love perseveres
Love never fails
Love is not easily angered, yet doesn’t delight in evil
Love is ever before me
Love is better than life itself
Love is as strong as death
Love is the fulfillment of the law
This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. 1 Jn. 3.16
Love requires sacrifice. This is my current lesson on love.
[luke 9.23 Then he said to them all: "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.]
slowness
I’ve not quite gotten prepared to update my blog from the Romania trip. There’s much to talk about, but the words just don’t seem to fall onto this digital paper about that experience.
My life: satan is trying to destroy something which he no right messing with. he’s had his grimy hands involved for way too long and it’s time for him to reliquish his grip. The stakes are high, very high. There is much at stake. The battle will be messy, and require much effort. The strongman has a sentinel trained well with weapons. But there is One who is stronger, One who is able to bind the strongman with one word. This Mighty One is coming. I can see Him riding in His chariot, sailing on the wings of the wind, focused and determined to set free the prisoner. There are some strongholds which need to be removed in order for someone to be set free. This prisoner has been bound for so long that his vision is blinded; he’s begun to think life can’t get any better than being chained and shamed. It’s time for a miracle to happen. It’s time for this special person to be released from the past, and free to experience grace and acceptance.
Lord Almighty, come with Your fire and power!
Jesus, by the power you gave me by your death and resurrection, I bind the sentinel, the strong man, and their strongholds.
satan no longer has authority to keep this prisoner under his lock and key.
King Jesus, by your pardon You have already awarded this person a life of freedom. You paid the highest price required to set this prisoner free: the Prince’s blood was shed.
I rejoice in the work You are about to accomplish.
quick update from Romania
hey all - just a quick update from Romania. we are doing great. loving our time with the Mather family. we've been to the orphanage once and framed a garage. the camp is a great place. i'll post photos when i get back to the States. today is prom for Sarah, one of the Mather's daughters. we are planning on finding a geocache this afternoon. it's now 10.30 in the morning. ok need to run.
legacy
Weapons by Jars of Clay
Hallelujah, we can finally hear
It's a miracle we feel anything at all
Things we planted on the worst days of the year
Grew to fingers that rip at the joy
And set our backs against the wall
Lay your weapons down
Lay your weapons down
There are no enemies in front of you
Hallelujah, we can finally see
How the bitterness was bruising on our skin
We didn't notice that grace had run so thin
Till we're falling apart and the cracks in our hearts let the truth sink in
gifts
This morning as i was leaving our apartment, the staff for the complex was handing out ‘breakfast on the go’ bags near the entrance gate. In the grab bag was a banana, an apple, a honey bun, and a juice box. so far all i’ve eaten is the banana, but getting a little gift early in the morning was a cool surprise. Ok, so i’m the lame one who really appreciates ‘breakfast on the go’. Another nice surprise was a little note left for me by my husband near the coffee pot. Troy is great about leaving notes and goofy drawings.
A year ago troy and i were getting geared up for our wedding. Crazy how quickly the time has flown by! I remember lacey trying to go over all the last minute details, trying to get me to do things which she ended up taking care of, like purchasing the sweet ties for all the guys. I laugh thinking about my parents, trying to organize the south dakota details. It’s pretty crazy trying to plan a wedding 1200 miles from where you’re living. And yet with all that being said, the wedding was great, and at the end of the day, troy and i were married with our parent’s blessing. Even tho i kid troy about how i would’ve wanted a different wedding with all the friends and family at the beach, our wedding was just lovely! 10 year anniversary – definitely going to some beach, some where – even if that means a mission trip to Bali! Who knows, maybe we’ll be missionaries on a beach in 10 years!
I love that troy and i are spending our first anniversary on a mission trip, helping people in a foreign country. That delights me. I’m grateful that God has blessed me with a wonderful husband who is willing to travel to a foreign country to spend 9 days working his butt off. That’s love.
beauty
So a friend of mine asked me an interesting question yesterday: ‘what could add beauty to your life today?’ then she went on to describing examples like a waterfall, a song, a painting, etc. i answered her by saying that i taken the mail out to the post box and the smell of fresh cut grass took me by surprise. So that was my answer: ‘fresh cut grass adds beauty.’
So what would your answer be? What would add beauty to your life today?
On Good Friday i received a call from an old friend whom I hadn’t talked to in many years. That added beauty to that day.
Saving $18 using coupons on my bill of $42 adds beauty, also.
Anoop being safe for one more week on american idol – beautiful.
Getting an Easter basket from a friend – definitely beautiful.
Getting flowers from my husband – most definitely beautiful.
Having a night at home with my husband added beauty, too. (yet having to watch the tea parties from around the country subtracted a little beauty.)
joyful in hope
Current theme of my life:
Romans 12.12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.
Re-current phrase:
I did not get married so i could spend my week alone. If i wanted a weekend lover, i could’ve found one of those without the stress of an ex-, kids and in-laws.
So what do those two things say about the state of my life?
tomorrow, today, yesterday
tomorrow
...will be the first night this week my husband will be at home.
...will be Good Friday. I would like to go to a service tomorrow evening in observance of the special day.
...will be our Cook-Out during lunch here at work. looking forward to some burgers and dogs from the grill. not looking forward to baking something tonight because my troy is out of town.
...will be rainy.
today
...is payday.
...is cloudy.
...is slow at work.
... is the day i need to work on a scrapbooking project.
yesterday
...was trivia night with some friends. we had a great time catching up on life, even if we didn’t win a the game.
...was sunny.
...held some frustrating moments.
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