Def/n: Tact

1 : sensitive mental or aesthetic perception
2 : a keen sense of what to do or say in order to maintain good relations with others or avoid offense

in the last two days, i've been involved in two different conversations about being full of tact (tactful) - one with troy and one with kimberly. i value both of these people's opinions, so what they have to say really matters to me.

so what is it about tact which can cause certain situations to be closed off from communication or opened to allow others to speak freely regarding whatever is on their heart? that is the depth of tact.

i come from a family who speaks their mind, often over-stepping their grounds, and lacking any consideration for other's thoughts/feelings. my family speaks of gutting deer at the the dinner table without any thought that it may not be an unappropriate discussion. on the other hand, shottie has a way of saying, 'i'm going to need a little more sensitivity than that.' that's a good way of saying, 'you are not using tact.' so i'm grateful for the people in my life who draw my attention to those details where i'm insensitive, unconsiderate, and uncouth.

i'm such a nerd that i looked up the definition of uncouth, which is 'lacking polish and grace.' that's a great word. that word pretty much sums up my immediate family to a T. no offense to my family, but we are uncouth. we've are strong-willed, hard-working, prideful, competitive, often un-sensible, too often slow to forgive folks. change is hard for us. we stick with tradition, fear change, and doubt new ideas. (uncouth people need much grace.)

so as i'm planning/offering ideas for this upcoming wedding - i'm learning that what i want to portray may come across as selfish, un-traditional, un-thoughtful, un-respectful, un-wise to others. and this is by no means my ('our' - because troy is included in this) intention. we simply want to do something meaningful with our lives instead of fall into the tradition of the american dream. (and by now all you readers are convinced that i've lost my mind and i've fallen into 'bridezilla' mode - which is soooo not the case. --that's why i have lacey, casey, shottie, denise, laura, kimberly and troy who is 'groomzilla'.)

so i'm running a thought around my heart/head - trying to make it tactful. it may take a few days/weeks, but by God's grace - it will not be overly offensive to people... i'm praying for wisdom and grace, and i'm trusting His plan for us includes a trip to Kenya.