Insecurity

that word keeps coming into convervastion. insecurity - what am i insecure about? perhaps it goes along the lines of what do i fear? what in my life is out of my control? should i feel insecure about those things? who helps me overcome my insecurities? am i willing to share with those people what i feel insecure about?

last sunday's message by andy stanley was about 'who are you doing life with?'. he spoke about being transparent - not hiding behind the facade of what people should act like. everyone has junk in our lives which really needs to be dealt with. i'm learning this more and more each day. i tend to be the person who holds things in... so i am glad for friends who allow me to share in my own time. eventually i open up and tell others what has been going thru my mind - sometimes it takes years, but it comes out. having a rough childhood can cause someone to get a bit calloused. i am fiercely independent, this i know.

so what am i insecure about? guess my Counselor will reveal that to me. i'm praying for openness and for Him to speak clearly so i can be attentive and listen to His voice. i want to grow up and thrive, not just remain the child who used to hide under her blankets because she saw demons dancing on her bed.

there is great freedom in knowing you are loved. having accepted love makes it easier to share love.